Hurricane Irma is not something to joke about. It’s terrifying and ground breaking - literally and figuratively. It’s so strong, seismographs - the things that measure earthquakes - are recording its power. Here are some stats, with some common, everyday references, to help you understand it’s unprecedented strength.

  • Its winds have reached speeds of 185mph. You walk about 3 mph. Usain Bolt sprints at 44mph. Nascar racers max out at about 200 mph. That's way too fast for winds to be swooshing around.

  • It’s leveled Barbuda, demolishing 95 percent of its buildings. Making them, as a Chef would say, “deconstructed houses”.

  • It is estimated to cost around $150 million to make Barbuda inhabitable again. That’s roughly the net worth of Angelina Jolie.

  • Experts are estimating up to $180 billion in damages in the US. That’s over two Bill Gates worth of panic and destruction.

  • It literally strips the trees of it’s leaves. It takes a whole season to do that normally.

  • There could be waves up to 23 feet high. Three Yao Ming’s.

  • No two category 4 hurricanes have ever made landfall in the US in the same year. It’s almost as if the CLIMATE is CHANGING.

  • The eye of Hurricane Irma is 25-30 miles wide. That’s a god dang Marathon. The entire storm is over 400 miles wide, nearly the entire length of Florida, and 100 miles less than The Proclaimers would walk.

  • Hurricane Irma is so strong that it appears to have broken the equipment at the weather station on the Caribbean island of St. Barthelemy. Kinda like when Shaq broke the rim and shattered the glass. That shit is not supposed to happen.

  • Irma is more powerful than all 8 major storms of the 2017 Atlantic hurricane season combined. Just, what?

  • Irma is also problematic because Hurricane Jose is following right behind and is expected to take a similar path. Basically, holy fuck.

If you live in, are visiting, or somehow woke up in Florida after a wild Labor Day party that just didn’t end, please stay safe and follow the instructions of qualified professionals. No macho, tough guy BS please. Get out of Irma's way. She's not fucking around.

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